The
soccer ball hit my crotch, going at - a conservative estimate - a
thousand miles an hour. I knew that was going to happen from the
moment he kicked it, but I couldn't move fast enough to get out of
the way. If I was a better athlete, I'd be a better athlete. What
kind of a stupid system is this, anyway?
As
I collapsed to my knees, I wondered if any of the guys in the Old
Testament had this problem. In between seeing fiery rings made out of
eyes, did Ezekiel ever predict that some donkey was going to kick him
in the crotch? If he averted the ball kicking, would it make him a
false prophet?
To read the rest, go to this page.
Good. Although I must admit I like your other writing better. Not that this is bad, I think it's mainly due to the fact that I'm not a "young adult". I imagine I would have loved a story written in such a manner when I was younger. If I ever meet any young adults, I'll suggest they read this and let you know what they say. :)
ReplyDeleteVery nice! Believable. Language was appropriate for a smarter than average teenager, but his imagination was still present through the hope of aliens and special powers. The actions of the other kids and adults in the story seem plausible as well. I think it has potential and could easily to be expanded into a full story (maybe this teenager will actually get his psionic power and take vengeance over Teddy and rule the world!!) Or something like that. :)
ReplyDeleteSounds like a nice re-enactment of my high school years. I do like it a lot, and especially if this kid ends up getting some kind of power or something, it would fulfil at lot of fantasies.
ReplyDeleteComments very much appreciated!
ReplyDeleteIt's a re-enactment of my high school years as well. And my middle school years. And...let's just say I'm Charlie Thomas.